Island of Misfit Toys Special – The Jesus Christ Action figure
(Warning: May contain content that will be found sacrilegious by some, viewer discretion is advised)
Our Lord and plastic savior.
While I'm not trying to put down the JC, he just doesn't seem like the kind of person to make an action figure out of. First off there's the possible sacrilegious implications of rendering one whom many consider the son of god as a plaything for snot-nosed diaper-Dans. Does anybody really want Jesus being gummed by a bunch of sticky-fingered young-ens?
Assimilating JC into a kid's daily play seems like it would be fraught with difficulties. Firstly, think of the awkwardness figure picking. Does it constitute a sin if you forgo picking Jesus for your team in place of a figure with kung-fu grip or a missile launcher. The only special feature the Jesus figure has (other than salvation power, I guess) is that he has wheels… yep, wheels... Ralph Wiggum was right.
Once the kids pick their teams, the real confusion begins. How does a child adapt wheelie Christ for play with their G.I.Joes and other figs? It doesn't seem to make a lot of sense to have Wheels kicking ass and taking names, but if not that then what does a kid use him for? How does a child play with the great one? We at Fever Dream have brainstormed this quandary and have presented the following possible uses… |
