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Pirate Action figure playset
Pirates are big right now. Between the big whorish movie fiascos recently and the attacks on cruise liners inspiring copycat cruise liner attacks, everyone has again fallen in love with these murderous thieving monsters. It only makes sense that in all this fun companies would attempt to make a profit on the phenomenon with half-assed toys, and boy is this one ever half assed.
Whoever came up with this set knows less about prates than Gilbert and Sullivan. The set gives you everything to re-create the standard privateer adventure: Three inbred-looking pirates, a flag, a wooden fence, a trough full of food, and two poisonous snakes. What the hell kind of pirates are these? Are they suppose to be attempting to claim a viper farm in the name of Pirate Spain? |
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AquaSaurus Water Squirter
Scientists may not know why the dinosaurs went extinct, but this toy sure explains why they went blind. Why would anyone think it was a good idea to make a squirt gun in the shape of a dinosaur and put the trigger on the crotch?! Were dinosaurs commonly known to veraciously spit during masturbation? Is there a sub-culture of young-ins who were really turned on by Jurassic Park that this toy was made for?
I suppose the idea of a dinosaur spitting on your intended target is good for a lark, but at what cost man? Do we really want are children becoming dino-fluffers?
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